Wednesday, November 5, 2014


Awhile back I downloaded an App called "timehop" which syncs your social media and lets you relive the past...Which is great if the past is something you actually want to relive. Occasionally my timehop reveals fun events like drinking with friends, sporting events or concerts I had forgotten I attended, etc. And sometimes it reveals a previous time I was on this journey. 

A little part of me dies inside when I see where I was only 2 short years ago. I did a half marathon a year and a half ago...holy crap you guys! I went on vacation wearing size 14 shorts and size large tops less then 17 months ago! And I could see my collar bones, which doesn't seem like much to most, but it was huge for me! 

2 Years ago I signed up for a half marathon, and the following May, I completed it. I cried when I crossed that finish line.  Did I run the whole thing? Heck No! Did I almost give up? HECK YES! But I pushed through, and I ran across that finish line and I had never been prouder of myself or what I had done.

So what happened? Why am I starting over AGAIN! Why am I in a size 20 pants (too tight) and 2 XL shirts again? 

Because I went back to doing what I had always done. I started eating crap, again. I stopped working out, again. And found myself 55 pounds heavier, again. What's to say this won't happen again? I have NO idea...I wish it were that easy. I wish I could say that I won't fall again, but I can't. Because this is MY journey, and I know that I will fall, and I know that I will cheat. But I will get back up! And I will get back on track. I have faith that I will find a way to meet my goals. All I can do is take it one day at a workout at a meal at a burpee at a time!   

This morning I had the privilege of working out with some amazing ladies at boot camp. I've been doing boot camp for 4+ weeks now and while I have felt a change in my endurance and strength, I haven't seen a change on the scale (by my own doing with bad choices with food and alcohol). I have made up excuses as to why I can't make a workout and I have justified eating unhealthy foods. Worst of all, I have been phoning it in with the the workouts that I do make. Today was the opposite. These ladies pushed me and while I thought they were crazy for wanting to double the exercises and skip the active recovery, I did it with them, and I loved every minute. They pushed me to the extreme, and I pushed my body to places I was proud of again. They welcomed me with open arms and asked me to do it with them again tomorrow. While I can't guarantee that I won't fall in this journey, I may just have surrounded myself with people that will pick me right back up when I do.  

So in the words of myself 2 years ago today...I'm Excited and Nervous, but ready to conquer the next milestone in this journey...AGAIN!

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